Five years ago this month, my life coach said the words that changed my life forever.

I had just quit my job at a tech company to pursue my dream career as a Sex and Intimacy Coach and start my own practice. I was excited—but even more scared. She guided me through the beginning stages of building my brand and business, helping me take my first steps into the unknown.

One day, during a phone session, she laid out my next action steps. First, she told me to create a Google and Yelp business page. Done. Then, she instructed me to find 4–6 people to coach for free for four weeks in exchange for a Google and Yelp review.

That was my homework. And the moment I heard it, I started crying.

She gently asked, “How do you feel?”

“Scared,” I sobbed.

“Well, Jocelyn,” she said, “this is just going to be one of those things where you have to feel the fear and do it anyway.”

WOAH… WHAT?!

No one had ever told me this before. The concept felt so foreign. Feel the fear and do it anyway? Up until that point, fear had always been my stop sign. If I was scared of something, I simply wouldn’t do it. I’d run the other way. Why on EARTH would I do something if I was terrified?

And then it hit me—fear doesn’t just disappear. If I wanted to move past it and achieve what I truly desired, I had to take action while being scared. That realization was one of the biggest game changers of my life. 

Since that moment, this phrase has become my mantra, guiding me to do things I never imagined possible.I loved it SO MUCH, I have it now tattooed on my arm. And because of it, I’ve accomplished some pretty incredible (and scary) things.

Here are just a few…

I have travelled solo… A LOT

Ever since I can remember, I have always wanted to travel the world. Living in another country, learning a new language, walking unfamiliar streets, and immersing myself in different cultures has always been my absolute dream!  

When I was 18, I thought joining City Year—a year-long commitment for young adults to support inner-city kids in afterschool programs while living together and building community—would be a great first step! I applied and got accepted! I was so excited, but when I told my mother about it, she said I couldn’t do it (even though I was 18… in Latino homes, you’re 12 until you’re 40—ha!). I was devastated and disappointed, but more than anything, I think this deepened my fear of being independent. What was my mom so scared of?  

Two years later, I got accepted into a study abroad program in Santiago, Chile, but once again, I didn’t go. This time, fear got the best of me—plus, I was in a relationship with someone who told me he would break up with me if I went. I chose him. And yet, we broke up two months after I was supposed to leave. My 20-year-old, insecure self didn’t have the courage to choose *herself*—but that’s OK. She learned soon enough.  

Three years later, I went to Europe to spend six weeks with my cousin in Spain. We planned to travel all over together, but plans changed—she fell in love with an Icelandic man, and I was left to travel on my own. At first, I was so angry. But that anger quickly turned into total and complete excitement when I realized I would be *completely alone*, free to do whatever my heart desired—and that’s exactly what I did!  

Reykjavík, Iceland 2013

Manchester, England 2013

Paris, France 2013

Those six weeks always stayed with me. But I never had the courage to travel solo again until I heard those life-changing words from my coach. A little over a year later, I decided to move to Playa del Carmen, Mexico. My plan was to stay for a month and then go somewhere else. By this time, my business was thriving, I had a large online following, and clients were flowing in. I was beyond grateful and excited! I ended up staying in Playa for almost a year. Then, on a whim, I decided to spend six weeks in Colombia with some friends. It was such a blast!  

In the last five years, I have lived in and visited Mexico, Colombia, Spain, Croatia, Turkey, Portugal, Brazil, and Italy.

Sunrise and Arcroyoga, Quintana Roo Mexico 2022

Pasta making class in Venice, Italy 2023

Sagrada Familia, Barcelona 2022 and Rio de Janeiro Carnaval 2024

Blue Mosque and friends, Istanbul 2023

I currently live in Tulum, Mexico, and I have plans to move to Asia by the end of the year.  

Fear once held me back. But now? It pushes me forward.  

I am no longer afraid of traveling alone because, honestly, I am *never* alone. I always make friends wherever I go and can create community anywhere. I am beyond proud of myself and cannot wait to continue seeing the world!  

I got lit on fire in the mountains of Lake Atitlan, Guatemala

I had gone back to Playa del Carmen for a couple of months when I saw an ad in a WhatsApp group chat about an AcroYoga Tantra retreat in the mountains of Lake Atitlán, Guatemala. I literally didn’t even think about it. I bought a ticket, booked my round-trip flight, arranged a private cab from the airport to the retreat location, and BOOM—I was on my way to Guatemala.

This retreat was incredible. I met so many wonderful people and had so much fun! On the second-to-last day of the event, they held an activity where people were lit on fire while doing AcroYoga poses. The purpose? To literally face your fears. And setting yourself on fire is one hell of a way to do it.

When the facilitator asked who wanted to try, I jumped at the opportunity—again, without thinking. It was so scary, but what a fucking story!

I got lit on fire, naked, in the mountains of Lake Atitlán, Guatemala.

So. Freaking. Cool.

I gave up alcohol

You might have read that title and thought to yourself, “How is that a scary thing to do?” Well, when you've been drinking since you were 14 and typically drink 2-3 times a week on average for the last 10 years, then yeah—giving that up sounds freaking scary.

I mean, who the hell am I even without alcohol?

At this time, I was living in Spain and working with an online fitness coach. I had been with her for a year and saw some results, but not nearly as much as I expected after a full year of working together. When we started, I told her very sternly that the ONLY thing I REFUSED to give up on this fitness journey was alcohol.

"I love to party!" I would tell her. "I am not giving that up—it’s way too big a part of who I am."

She respected that boundary and never told me to quit drinking. But what she did do was ask me how much I drank every single week. And of course, I started noticing a pattern.

Every week, I would cry about not losing weight and feel so frustrated. Then, she’d ask me, “How much did you drink this week?” And my answer? Somewhere between 10-15 drinks ALMOST WEEKLY!

Girl. No fucking wonder I wasn’t seeing results.

So, I finally said FUCK IT and gave it up.

I am not a half-ass type of person. When I do something, I go hard, so I committed to a year without alcohol. I did my best and only drank a handful of times that year.

And holy moly—I learned so much.

When you stop drinking, you don’t just give up alcohol—you shift who you are. Your identity, your social life, your sense of fun—it all changes. But in the best way possible. Here are a few lessons I’ll take with me forever:

• Hangovers SUCK. They’re almost never worth it and make you unproductive for days. I got so used to waking up fresh that when I wasn’t hungover, I realized just how productive I could be!
• Your real friends will support you. For some reason, people feel judged when you tell them you’re not drinking. Some will peer pressure you or make comments, but your real ones won’t. They’ll encourage and support you, and I feel so grateful to have friends like that.
• You can literally pretend to be drunk around drunk people, and they won’t know the difference. Once I figured this out, I started partying sober and just acted the way I would if I were drunk. No one knew the difference!
• You sleep WAY better without alcohol.
• You’re way less bloated. At least I was!
• Your mind is much clearer and quicker. Alcohol sometimes makes you feel stupid, and I hated that.
• Diet Cokes, soda water, and cigarettes (I know this one is bad, but I’m keeping it real) are your best friends if you wanna stay up late and rage. They kept me awake and able to stay till the end of the party.

Hope these help if you’re ever thinking about giving up alcohol. Enjoy!

I learned to do a headstand 

One of my absolute favorite things about Mexico (and trust me, there are SO many things to love!) is how much people just do not give a fuck.

I took an acroyoga class, and the instructor told everyone to get into a headstand. At the time, I was mortified—I had never even tried to put myself upside down. When he came over to me, I told him I couldn’t do it.

He literally laughed in my face and said, “Do it.”

So, I did. And he held me.

I was astonished that I was able to do it.

That moment lit a fire inside me, and for the next two years, I committed to perfecting my headstands. I practiced almost every day after my workouts for about 10-15 minutes, and within a year and a half or so, I became fully confident in them.

Now, I love being upside down!

But don’t get me wrong—starting off was scary AF!

I allowed myself to fall in love and take him on the journey with me

My most recent venture that has scared the shit out of me… giving my heart to someone.

After deciding to travel full-time and being single for three years, I told the universe I was ready to meet someone special. I made a list of everything I desired and then just lived my life. Two months after writing that list, I met him at an acroyoga meetup in Los Angeles. I didn’t think anything of it, but after hanging out a few times… I had fallen in love.

The last several months have been a deep dive into working through tons of fears in romantic connection—fear of abandonment, fear of rejection, fear of vulnerability. MAN! The fears just kept coming! I was overwhelmed, and sometimes, they felt too strong for me to handle.

I feel so grateful to have a partner who has held me through all of it, has given me more than enough evidence to show me I can trust him, and has created a safe place for my fears to honestly just die. They still pop up from time to time, but the security I have now—not just in him, but in myself—to take care of me no matter what happens is far stronger than the fear.

I love you, papi. Thank you for being in my life! ❤️

So, to you that’s reading… ready to STOP letting fear rule your life?! If so, I got you. Schedule a connection call and let’s talk. You are WAY to worthy and deserving to hold yourself back any longer.